Monday 9 March 2015

KB Shimmer holos and a sad sad day for glitters everywhere

Hurrah, holo!! I've got three new polishes by KB Shimmer available from Harlow & Co. to show off today. Harlow & Co. stocks over 30 indie nail polish brands and they ship both domestically to the US and Canada (free shipping for orders over $50!) and internationally as well! 

You're prob wondering why I said three new polishes and there's clearly only two here... scroll down and you'll find out... though you may regret it LOL.

KB Shimmer holos from Harlow & Co.

So when I opened my package from Harlow & Co. I was all like "SWEET KB SHIMMER HOLOS!" cause I have always heard great things, and then I saw this pinkish-milky-glitter thing and was like UM WHAT NOW.

Okay full disclaimer - I'm not saying this polish is fugly to its creators, I mean, some people actually do like milky glitters. I am not one of them. Why would you put sparkly beautiful glitter in a bowl of soggy-milk cereal, like why just why?????? It looks like someone had a bowl of froot-loops cereal washed down with some beer for breakfast then went out day drinking with the girls to pre-drink for a Kesha concert and then vomited up this disasterpiece after they started mixing alcohols by having one too many long island ice teas with their beers. And remind me, why do I want to wear it on my nails????

Totally don't intend to knock KB Shimmer, I mean they make some damn sexy holos. I just personally can't stand milky glitters, no matter what the brand, and generally speaking no matter what the colour. DO NOT DROWN GLITTER IN SOGGY CEREAL MILK, RESPECT THE DAMN GLITTER AND LET IT SHIIIINNNNNEEEEEAAAAAHHH.

Okay moving right along now.

Swatch conditions:

First up, Ins and Sprouts from Harlow & Co. If I had an emoji selector right here right now I would insert the little hand doing the "very niiiiiceee"/"okay"/"perfect" signal (I just realized I have no idea what the actual term is for that gesture where you make an O with your pointer and thumb and let your other three fingers stick up). In any case what a gorgeous grassy-lime green holo! This is three coats. The polish is a bit streaky on the first two coats but the third smoothed it out just fine! Love this colour for spring! Dear weather... start showing signs of spring k thanks baaaaiiii.

Next, def a stunnah, Men are From Mars-ala from Harlow & Co.! Not quite as holo as the green one since it had a bit more of a creamy formula as opposed to a metallic finish, but this is actually a perfect two-coater! I was nicely surprised by what great coverage this red vixen has. Gawwwgggeouus!! Colour of the year done right, 'cause this actually doesn't even remotely look like a hybrid of blood and poop!! Good job KB Shimmer! *clapping hand emojis*

Accent nail! Clearly you can tell I was lazy af cause I did the most random freehand that doesn't make any sense. What is this? A flower with detached leaves? An octopus whose tentacles were cut off? Some abstract interpretation of Gone with the Wind? I'm as clueless as you.

I used my trusty Chinese sumi brush from @sharingvu on Instagram and black acrylic paint for this random painting (truth be told I can't actually draw/paint... ye... nail artist pfffft, ikr?) and a random gem from Born Pretty Store.

And finally, last and definitely least, the sad sad funeral for all glitter that was tossed aside into a bowl of soggy cereal. I give you the probably-once-epic glitter concoction that was conquered by spoiled milk.... I don't even remember the name. Hold on.... okay it's To Peach His Own. I guess that's just it right! To each her own taste in glitter polish... in soggy puke milk or not. 

It says it has holo glitters... BUT YA CAN'T REALLY TELL, CAN YA?

It's also nearly the same colour as my skin tone... not complementary at all, clearly. I didn't like the milky formula in this one, it actually took me 4 coats to get it fully opaque... what a surprise. I'm not biased at all.

The colour of the macros under this are more colour accurate than the swatch pics (more dirty-rotten-orange-peel leaning rather than fake-chicken-pink-goo leaning) - the redness of my skin threw off the colours like mad. Also I was too lazy to colour correct these pics in post-production... no Photoshop can help this nailtastophy anyways.

And what the hell was I supposed to do for my accent nail with this one... I have no idea. Would you wanna lick this ice cream? 

Click to watch tutorial!
Click to watch tutorial!

Okay so depressing right!! Just remember the two epic holos in the post and your memory will be erased of soggy-milk-glitter nightmares, I promise you.

You can find these three polishes at Harlow & Co. - they offer free shipping for orders over $50 (Canada & US) and free shipping over $100 for international buyers! Go now, hurry, the peachy puke one might sell out!!!!!!!!!!!

*Polishes were provided by Harlow & Co. for my impartial review (clearly, impartial, as you can see).


  1. Hahaha. This was awesome to read! But I agree with you....that pink one is not cute to look at

  2. Girl, you are tooooo funny, literally Lmao!!!!! Love that men are from marsala one. The green one I like the holo effect just not really a fan of the color, and the left over fruit loop milk.... well I'm just cool on that one. However, I do like your accent nail though.

  3. Best.Review.Ever. I even read it to my boyfriend!

  4. I personally love Crelly Glitters, the dimensions on them are so layered and fantastic! Have you tried them before? Perhaps this one is just not your colour mix. Clever and funny, but poor crelly/glitter mix polishes! A whole segment of the polish industry flushed down the toilet after a Kesha concert!!! The horror! Lol. KBShimmer does this exceptionally well too...try a white or teal based one...double dog dare you!!

  5. LOL this was a hilarious post! Thanks for being honest :)

  6. Hi Cristine, I tend to agree with you on crelly glitter polishes. The way to wear them that works best for me is to put 1-2 layers of a similarly colored basecoat on first, then just one (or maybe 2 thin) coats of the crelly glitter. But they can still remain too chunky feeling on the nail for me, and it's a pain to have to use basecoats just to "correct" the problems with the crelly glitter (like not opaque enough, too chunky, not enough shine or holo to the glitters). On the other hand, it's nice to have so many options in nail polish nowadays -- like holos, metallics, chromes, textures, etc. Back when I was growing up, your only choices were cremes and pearl-finishes. Today we have many options for the many different opinions out there.

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